Senior Sunday: How to Tell a Loved One It’s Okay to Ask for Help

Many people find it difficult to admit they need help, especially as they grow older. Independence is something we all value, and for seniors, the idea of asking for help can sometimes feel like losing control. As family members and caregivers, one of the most loving things we can do is remind our loved ones that asking for support is not a sign of weakness—it’s a step toward living a fuller and healthier life.

The first step is to approach the conversation with empathy. Instead of telling a loved one what they can’t do, focus on what support can make possible. For example, instead of saying, “You can’t do this alone,” you might say, “I want you to have more time and energy for the things you enjoy, and having help will make that easier.” This shifts the focus from limitation to opportunity.

It’s also important to reassure them that asking for help doesn’t mean giving up independence. Many seniors fear that accepting help will lead to losing control of their lives. Framing support as a way to maintain independence can be powerful. For instance, having someone assist with heavy chores or transportation may actually allow them to keep enjoying favorite activities longer.

Sharing personal experiences can also open the door. Letting a loved one know about a time you needed help and how it made things better shows that everyone needs support at times. It normalizes the idea that asking for help is part of being human, not a sign of weakness.

Another gentle way to encourage help is to start small. Instead of suggesting a full shift in their lifestyle, you might encourage accepting help with one or two tasks. Over time, your loved one may feel more comfortable with receiving additional support once they see the benefits.

Most importantly, remind them that asking for help is an act of strength, not surrender. It takes courage to recognize when we need others, and it creates deeper bonds of trust and connection within families. When loved ones understand that seeking help allows them to thrive—not just survive—they can begin to see it as a positive choice.

Encouraging a loved one to ask for help requires patience, compassion, and reassurance. By focusing on the benefits, respecting their dignity, and walking alongside them in the process, we can help them see that accepting support is one of the best ways to live life fully.